Tired of having to sort out the “nice guys” from the “bad boys”? Want to move up from one-night stand to full-time girlfriend, but unsure of how to do so? Stop worrying, because Real Live College Guy Dale is here to help with all of your collegiette love kerfuffles and steer you clear of unnecessary boy drama during your brief but ever-important time in college.
I hooked up with this guy three times right at the end of the semester. He was a senior and I was a freshman. We really hit it off (it seemed) and have been talking almost every day since we left campus. Sometimes the conversation is flirty (he's mentioned visiting me in the fall) and sometimes it seems totally platonic. I'm really starting to fall for him, but I know it doesn't seem practical, especially because we live nowhere near one another. Is it worth holding hope that something will come of it, or was I simply his "last hurrah" on campus? – Wondering at WashU
Wondering,
You may not have been a “last hurrah,” but the odds of things working out in the long run… well, take it from someone who has been in a long-distance relationship: they’re not exactly 100 percent.
However, the fact that you hooked up three times is awesome. Sure, people casually hook up all the time, but I don’t believe that anyone who was looking for just casual anything would make the effort to talk to their hook-up every day afterward.
Guys, like girls, are weird when it comes to talking. Sometimes, we’re all about making you feel good (“Hey, beautiful”), and sometimes we’re just talking––and it’s easy to confuse platonic conversation with a lack of interest. However, it’s just as easy to read too much into what your partner is saying. And it sounds like you’ve got yourself a partner (even if it isn’t Facebook official).
Now, here’s the difficult part: he’s done. He graduated and is off to do whatever, wherever. You’ve got a few more years left. As romantic as it can be to have your guy come visit you, it’s not likely that that will happen consistently. Travel isn’t cheap, and unless both of you put in equal effort to make things work out, it probably won’t.
Like I said, though, I doubt any man would hook up with a girl three times in succession and continue talking to her (every day or not) post-graduation unless he wasn’t actually interested. If the two of you can handle the work that is a long-distance relationship—a hundred miles or a thousand––then you’ve got my blessing.